BANK ROBBERY FOILED…

 

BANK ROBBERY FOILED…

witaroundthecorner.com

 

Foodlishly, a man armed with an extruder, used to make those cumulus versions of suspended cheese snacks today attempted to hold up a bank. Before his apprehension he managed to litter the bank with those delectables. Police responding post haste from a donut shop unfortunately have been unable to secure the crime scene-there is no material evidence left. The bank employees all were found on their hands and knees devouring the weapon of choice. When the bank president was asked how this could be his only reply was “Well, all I can say is our floors are in superbly clean shape due to our janitorial staff, no surprise.” In fact, there really is no actual proof of the man’s crime as the camera was inoperative and it really could pass for an inside job; all the tellers have the telltale orange hue all over their fingers and respective faces. The extruder in his possession is the only link to the crime. Thanks to the quick action of a security guard who himself was packing was the only reason this did not turn into a huge withdrawal minus the slip. He was able to slow down the felon with a few bursts from his Spanish Peanut air gun. He praised the weapon as each “nut” is uniformly sized which prevents jamming, and, besides being non-lethal, is also highly digestible and Eco-friendly. The accused is expected to appear in Food Court later today. Larry Legume reporting.

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